HedgeAggerate
by clawshifter
Summary: This is my second fanfic: A Sonic the Hedgehog and Ed Edd n Eddy crossover! I made this because I got bored.
1. To Make a Hedgehog Fly

**(Hi, readers! This is clawshifter's new story, Hedge-Aggerate. **

**Shadow: Why do I have to be the stupid one? Silver: Because the other roles mere taken. *Starts laughing* Me: Anyways, let's just start this story before someone gets hurt. I DO NOT OWN SONIC OR ED EDD N EDDY! SONIC BELONGS TO SEGA AND EDD EDD N EDDY BELONGS TO CARTOON NETWORK!**

**Enjoy 8-) Note: This story is told entirely from Sonic's P.O.V.)**

**Chapter 1: To Make a Hedgehog Fly**

I woke up this morning, sad that my dream had come to an end. But a quick look at the calendar cheered me up. Today's date said "Build Hedge-Land in backyard" I could feel my eyes widen, and then I just couldn't hold it in anymore. "!" I screamed. I then ran down the hall to get Shadow and Silver up. I found them still asleep in their rooms.

Despite how excited I was, I have to admit I didn't want to wake Shadow up yet. So I went into Silver's room. I slowly crept up to the bed, then snickered. Fortunately, he's a pretty deep sleeper, so he didn't wake up when I snickered. I then took my finger and stuck it in his ear! "Wake up, sleepyhead!" I yelled at him. Of course, he woke up when I stuck my finger in his ear, but the yell was just to help with it. As if on cue, he screamed and jumped out of the bed, my finger still in his ear. He was still screaming a little, but I couldn't breathe, I was laughing so hard.

"Sonic! That was not funny! You could've badly hurt my inner ear by doing that!" He told me. I know he was trying to be threatening, but he just sounded like a nerd, so I laughed even harder. "Wow. That sounded so much more threatening in my head." He said. When I finally stopped laughing, he asked me why I had woken him up at 7:30 in the morning. "Don't you remember? We need to get up early if we want to get a head start on Hedge-Land." I told him. His eye lit up with pleasure, but since his room is across the hall from Shadow's, he dared not yell. "C'mon, let's go wake up Shadow. We'll need him to make sure everything's working." He looked worried, but I told him my special little plan I had in mind to wake him up and he relaxed a little. "Fine." He said. "But if I get hurt, you're on your own." A little while later, me and Silver were sneaking into Shadow's room. Silver was carrying a bucket of motor oil with his telekinesis. We stopped at the doorway to Shadow's room, and Silver willed the bucket to hover just above Shadow's head. "Alright. Fire when ready." I said. He then dumped the oil all over Shadow, waking him up with a small yell. Me and Silver started laughing, but when he glared at us, we both ran for it. He chased us, but he hit his head on a table while doing so. It hit him so hard, he was almost as stupid as Eggman. When we saw him walking weird, we laughed a little.

"Let's stop wasting time and get outside. We have to build Hedge-Land." I said. Silver grabbed a box of nearby tools in his telekinesis and we went outside, dragging the stupefied Shadow with us.

I was glad that we had one of those weird spinning clotheslines in our backyard, because we were going to tie lawn chairs to it and turn it into a ride. I ran into the garage and came back with 2 folding lawn chairs, 4 wooden poles and a lot of rope. Silver started tying the chairs to the clothesline while I went back to the garage and came back with a bunch of wooden planks. I started to build a crude ticket booth using the boards.

We both were interrupted when Shadow said "What do I get to do?" I then led him to a small patch of grass about 5 feet from the ticket booth. Then I used the poles and whatever was left of the rope to make a pen that closed him in. "You will be the all important petting zoo animal." I told him. He just laughed a little like a retard. Then we both went back to what we were doing.

About a half hour later, Silver was oiling the pole that held up our lawn chair ride. "The Lawn Chairs Orbit Mobius ride is ready." He said. "Ticket booth, ready!" I said, pointing to my badly built ticket booth. "Petting zoo, a-okay!" Shadow called from his pen. "They'll push, they'll shove. They'll pay big bucks to come to our HEDGE-LAND!" I yelled to the neighbors. The flag that was on top of my ticket booth fell over a bit. "I'd like to run a small test first." Silver said. "Ooh, ooh, test the petting zoo!" Shadow said from his pen. I started to climb onto one of the hanging lawn chairs when he said that. "Hold onto your quill stripes, dude." I said. "Ooh, pet me now!" He said. I pulled myself onto the lawn chair. "This chair sucks." I said.

I then let Shadow out of his pen, and he helped me carry a new, more comfortable arm chair outside. "You're tampering with the laws of weight and balance, Sonic." Silver said. We just ignored him and got the chair hooked up. "Sonic? Ugh, ignorance must be blitz." He said as he walked away. I was relaxing in the chair. "Now we're talking." I said.

"Shall we begin, Shadow? Contact!" Silver said. Shadow gave the chair a weak push, then fell over. "What was that? C'mon, muscle head. Push!" I said. He then got back up and pushed me really hard, then fell over again. His push had sent the chair spinning around at high speed. "WOOO HOO HOO HOOO HOOOOOOOOOOO!" I yelled in enjoyment. Then the rope broke, sending my chair flying over the houses. "WE'RE GONNA BE RICH!" I screamed as I went flying. After that, there was a loud crash that made Silver flinch. "My turn!" Shadow yelled. He then Chaos Controlled to where I was, Silver running toward the sound.

"Holy crap! Nice push, Shad!" I said. My chair had gotten stuck in someone's window. I fell down from it and landed on the ground in front of them. "Did you see that chair fly!" I asked them.

"Who broke my window?" said an angry female voice from the house. Our friend, Becca the Snake, pushed the chair out of her window. "Hi, Becca!" Shadow called to her. The chair landed on him, flattening him into the ground. "Hedgehogs! Don't move!" She snapped at us.

**(That's all for Chapter 1. Hope you liked it. Now review or I will send the Tails Doll to kill you in your sleep.)**


	2. Legend of the Muckyhogs

**(Here we go with Chapter 2! Brace yourself for the hilarity you are about to witness. We left off where they had smashed Becca the Snake's window, and they're about to "tell" her what happened. Note: There is a bit of cussing in this chapter, but only a little.)**** Chapter 2: Legend of the Muckyhogs.**

Becca went outside and hissed at us. I could feel my fur getting damp with sweat, because I knew I had to come up with a good lie, and fast. My thoughts were interrupted when Silver said, "Sorry, Becca. While testing our new ride, we didn't estimate the weak link in Sonic's-" "Hush your lip!" I told him. I grabbed his mouth to make him shut up. "Who broke my window?" Becca asked us again. She pointed her tail up at her now smashed in window. I came up with a great lie to get her off our back. "Uh, didn't you see them?" I asked her. "Who?" She asked in an irritated tone. "The Muckyhogs!" I told her. Both she and Silver raised an eyebrow at that. "Muckyhogs?" She asked. I then came up with the story.

"Yeah." I said. Then I told her, "They were dumped off by a tornado, and raised by field mice. In a cave near the abandoned construction site. And they eat their weight in cheese. And they throw comfortable arm chairs through the airs and BAM! Into your window." She looked up at her smashed window, as if giving it some thought. "Bullshit!" She said as she looked back at me. "Look, there they go!" I said, pointing to her left. "Where?" "There!" I then pointed toward the street. "Freeze, Muckyhogs!" She screamed. Then she took off in that direction. I was surprised at how fast she could move with no legs.

Then I snickered . "She's such a dumbass. Muckyhogs. It cracked me up!" I told Silver. We then got the chair off of Shadow and went down the street. "Let's head back and test the petting zoo." I said. "Muckyhogs, oh Muckyhogs!" Shadow yelled from behind us. He then ran up behind us and fell on Silver, who in turn fell on me. "Did you see a flying comfortable chair?" Shadow asked. "Sonic, you should've told the truth." Silver told me. I then pulled myself from beneath them. "truth, shmuth. We're off the hook, ain't we?" I said as I started to walk away. However, I was soon stopped short by something that caught my eye. "C'mere, quick!" I told the others. "Check out the fags!" I said as Knuckles and Tails walked past. They both were wearing khaki pants and white shirts. Knuckles had a stick and Tails had a pair of binoculars. They could tell that I was trying not to laugh, because Knuckles then said, "Just ignore them, Tails."

"And what are our half pint pygmies up to today?" I asked them. Knuckles stopped and turned around. "If you must know, we're hunting." He said. Tails nodded in agreement. "For a brain?" I joked. "No! The Muckyhogs!" Knuckles snapped at me. "Uh, Muckyhogs?" I could feel sweat running down my neck. "You've heard of them, haven't you?" Knuckles asked. "Uh, yeah. Sure." Was my only response. "C'mon, Tails. Becca's waiting." He told Tails. Tails stuck his tongue out at us and walked away with Knuckles.

"Look out for flying chairs!" Shadow called to them. "Well, Sonic, it's only a matter of time until Becca finds out the truth ab-" "No problem!" I interrupted Silver. "We hedgehogs are smarter than-" "Onions?" Shadow guessed. Silver moaned. "No, Shadow." I said. I grabbed one of his quills and started to lead him away. "We're smarter than-" "Buttered toast?" He guessed again. "A buss driver?" He asked. "Oh, dear." Silver said in the background.

**(****I know this chapter is a lot shorter than the first one, but wait till you see where they go and what they do in the next chapter! Until then, review or get murdered by the Tails Doll.)**


	3. The Hunt Is On!

**(Here's Chapter 3! Trust me readers, this chapter is going to be hilarious!) ****Chapter 3: The Hunt Is On!**

I led Silver and Shadow to the abandoned construction site. Sure enough, Becca was already there. She had rounded up Knuckles, Tails and some of her other friends, Spectral the Hellhound and Joey the Kangaroo to help with their search. I signaled to the others to be quiet as we snuck around them and hid in an empty bulldozer. We watched as Becca put her tail into the old cement mixer and whipped it around. She pulled her tail out and looked inside. "No Muckies here." She said. "You finding anything over there, Joey?" "Not yet, Becca." Joey called back. He was near the half finished house at the other end of the site. Suddenly, Spectral tripped over a pipe and fell onto Knuckles. "I must have silence!" Joey yelled at them. He then took a handful of dirt and put it up to his ear. "The soil speaks to me. It tells me, 'Joey, the Muckyhogs are 50 paces toward the sun. Cooking beats.'" He said. Everyone was staring at him. "Are you sure?" Spectral asked. "Fool is you. The soil knows all." Joey told her. "Alright, follow me!" Becca said. She raised her tail a little.

When she looked in our direction, I ducked down. Silver then said, "Sonic, wouldn't it be easier if we just-" "Make funny noises?" Shadow said. I grabbed his ears and put his face in front of mine. "Shadow!" I said. "You found a brain! Hehe, Muckyhogs make loud, funny noises!" I then started to make a really weird noise that sounded like a sick dog, barking at something. Shadow grinned and started making a similar noise. Silver tried to shush us, but between our laughter and odd noises, we couldn't hear him. Shadow made a loud growling sound while I kept giggling a little.

I peeked up again and saw Becca, who looked a bit scared. "We have angered the Muckyhogs!" Joey yelled as he jumped up and clung to her. Knuckles yelled in fear and clung to Joey. Tails then clung to Knuckles, yelling "Help! Heeeelp!" in a whiny voice. Becca was starting to lean to the right. "When I see mucky, I'll believe mucky." She growled. "OUTTA MY WAY!" She yelled. She shoved everyone off of her and started to slither away. The others got up and followed her.

We took advantage of this to leave the dozer and hide behind a pile of mud. Shadow jumped and landed facedown in the mud when we got there. I pulled him up by the quills. "Shadow, you got mud on your face." I said. I then noticed his face print in the mud. "Nice face print." "I'm Shadow!" I heard Shadow say in the background. I then had a hilarious idea that I couldn't resist. "I know what'll fix Bec. Pawprints!" I said, taking off one of my shoes. (A/N: Yes, since they are animals they have paws.) Shadow got the idea and took off both of his boots. "Look, Mucky paws!" He said. I then took a big mallot and smashed his feet with it. His feet swelled to 20 times their original size. "Now THOSE are Mucky paws!" I said. Silver looked worried and started to say "Sonic, this is becoming a very complicated-" "Ok, Shadow. Now stomp down to the old drainpipe." I said. Shadow then stepped on me, and I stuck to his foot as he ran. "How am I doin', Sonic?" He asked. "Uh, where's Sonic, Silver?" He asked. And then he fell into a big pool of gross green water. His feet went back to their original size. "Stuck to your foot like an old sock." Silver said as he walked past. Shadow then reached around in the water and pulled me out by the ears. "Hey Sonic. We're here." He said.

We were just outside if a huge pipe that smelled like sewage. But we've been down here plenty of times, so the smell didn't bug us. "Bingo!" I said as I walked up to the entrance. "This is perfect for the Muckyhog's cave!" "It doesn't look very hygienic." Silver said in a sick tone of voice. "Way cool!" Shadow said. I then started to plot how we would trick Becca and her hunting party.

About 30 feet from the pipe, Tails fell into one of Shadow's huge paw prints from before. "Look at the size of this footprint." Joey said. "I have not seen feet this big since my great granfather!" "Let's follow 'em." Becca said. They then started to follow the trail of massive pawprints.

**(Again, another short chapter, but still funny as ever! Review or DIE!)**


	4. The Muckyhog Cave

**Chapter 4: The Muckyhog's Cave**

We ran into the pipe and started to make everything look like a primitive hideout. We put sticks and bones and other random stuff that was lying around on the walls and scattered across the floor. "This'll totally throw Becca off our backs!" I said. Silver looked at me. "Sonic, the authenticity of 'the cave' isn't that convincing. If we just tell Becca-" "I found a bone!" Shadow said. He had a big bone through his ears. "Cool, huh?" He started to move it a little. "Let's check out in here!" I heard Spectral say. "Hey, it's Becca." Shadow said. "Holy crap, Silver! We need to hide!" I said. Silver held up a can of rusty reddish brown paint. "It says 'covers in 1 coat'." He said. I then got the idea for how we would hide from the hunting party.

We could see Joey, Becca and Knuckles put their heads into the entrance. "It's the Muckyhog cave!" Joey said. The others were enthralled by our convincing work. They went into single file and walked inside. "Their hideous scent is everywhere." Joey observed. "Do you smell it?" Spectral plugged her nose. "Smells like Slasher's feet!" She said in disgust. Knuckles pushed Tails a little. "C'mon, Tails! We're falling behind!" He said. Tails looked back at him. "Ok, ok! These shoes are pinching my feet." Tails said in discomfort. He then tripped over the empty paint can that was in front of him. Knuckles bent down to get a better look, "Hmm, paint can.." He said. He then looked at the nearby cave painting. "..and cave paintings." He then walked up to the painting and put his hand on the painted pig. When he took his hand away, his glove was stained with the paint. "This paint's still wet!" He said. "C'mon, Tails. I smell something other than Muckyhogs." He said, walking away. He dragged Tails with him.

Silver's eyes opened and he jumped down from his position in the painting. "Sonic, Knuckles knows. It's only a matter of time." Shadow then started yelling, "My eyes are stuck! I can't open them!" Silver giggled a little. "Open your eyes, Shadow." I said. Shadow forcefully opened his eyes. "Thanks, Sonic!" He said. "Let's follow the hunting party. If it's Muckyhogs Becca wants, then it's Muckyhogs Becca gets!" I said, rubbing my hands together. I then told them my brilliant Muckyhog plan. Shadow agreed with it, but Silver just looked worried. We then went off down the tunnel after hunting party.

**(Wow, again, super short chapter, but still pretty funny. Sonic's genius plan will unfold in the next chapter. This will be best Sonic moment ever! Review or PERISH!)**


	5. Muckyhog Attack!

**(Alright, here's the last chapter to HedgeAggerate. This one will be significantly longer than the last few, and about 10 times funnier. So brace yourself for the extreme hilarity that you weaker types probably won't be able to handle. Now let's do this!)**

**Chapter 5: Muckyhog Attack!**

By using a new power that Silver had, we were able to sneak past the hunting party so we could get ready. "C'mon, Joey! How much longer?" I heard Becca whine. "My father once walked 100 miles with a mule 2 goats and a shoe on his back." Joey said. "Big deal." Spectral said sarcastically. "Here they come, Sonic!" Shadow said. We all had covered ourselves in mud and messed up our quills ahead of time. I found a pair of antlers nearby, then looked at Shadow. I grabbed it and ran up to him. "Put this on!" I said. I then put it on his head.

Silver whined and looked at himself. "Sonic, this mud is filthy!" He complained. "Get over it, Silver. Catch!" I said. I threw a metal lunchbox at him. "Catch? Oh dear." He said. The box hit him in the head, and he whined and almost fell over. I picked up a nearby wrench. "The Muckyhogs live!" I yelled. "Cool. Muckyhogs!" Shadow said. He spun the muddy shovel he had found between his palms, sending mud flying everywhere. He then hit himself in the head with it. I couldn't help but snicker.

Then Silver said, "Sonic, I desperately need to wash. Think we can just-" "Shadow Chaos Controlled in front of him and made a funny noise. "Be scary, Silver!" He said. Silver glared and growled. "I'm petrified!" I told him. "Here! We go up here!" I heard Joey say in the pipe. "Here they come! Positions!" We all ran to our positions as Joey pulled himself and the others out. He accidentally threw Becca, sending her flying back. She hit a wheelbarrow full of mud, making it fly toward Joey and cover him with it. He shook all the mud off of his head. "Looks like the Joey is too strong for his own good!" He said with a smile.

That was my cue. I jumped onto the beam of a half finished house behind Joey. "DI DUA DA DO ABBA DA DO DA DA DA DA!" I screamed behind him. He turned around and looked up at me. He then pointed at me. "M-Muckyhog!" He yelled in fear. Tails screamed. Spectral and Knuckles weren't fooled. Shadow popped out of a pile of mud, holding his shovel and wearing the fake antlers. Silver came in from the sidelines. We all started making really loud, weird noises. "You guys owe me a window!" Becca said, her eyes wide with fear. "I'm gone!" She slithered away at top speed. "Joey must water the weeds!" Joey said. He jumped so high, he didn't come back down. Me and the others started to corner Tails. "Knuckles? Oh Knuckles?" Tails yelled. He then hid behind the tipped over wheelbarrow. Shadow got down on his hands and feet and pawed at the ground. Steam puffed from his nostrils. I screamed wildly and jumped on his back. He then charged at Tails. Me and him chanted, "Mucky Mucky Mucky Mucky!" I then screamed "MUCKY!" as he plowed into the wheelbarrow, sending it flying. Tails' hat landed on his head. I then jumped off and he stood up. We then started beating the ground like morons. "Oh, Shadow!" Spectral called. Shadow turned to face her. "Rouge said you have to clean your room!" "Not now, Spectral! We're playing!" He called back. Knuckles burst out of the ground in front of Spectral with a big hose. I then grabbed Shadow's mouth and pulled on it. "You have got the biggest mouth!" I yelled at him. Knuckles drenched us with the hose, washing the dirt off and making us drop our props. "There's your Muckyhogs." Spectral said. Me and Silver were shivering from the cold water, but Shadow kept yelling and acting weird. "Ok, dude." I said. I stuck my arm through his ears. "Show's over, man. Take 5."

Becca started to growl. She arched her neck and started to bare her teeth. "Muckyhogs! Pretty funny, right? Bec?" I said. She kept growling and her eyes were turning red. A sound like a tea kettle whistle was coming from the back of her head.

_A while later… _"Well, Sonic. This all could've been avoided if you just-" Silver was interrupted when Shadow said, "My nose is itchy." "Well, scratch it." I said. "Scratch it for me, Sonic!" He said. He leaned closer to me and started twitching his nose. "Get away from me!" I yelled at him. "Well, I would scratch it for you, Shadow, but I'm a bit preoccupied at the moment!" Silver said. We were all hanging from one of the houses by our ankles. Becca had chained us up here 3 days ago. To make sure we didn't try to break loose, she had chained our hands to the ground. "Shut up, Silver." I said.

We heard flapping and saw a red gryphon guy with yellow eyes flew up to us. He was holding a solid gold staff in his hands, balancing a cake on a plate on it. "Look, Staff!" He said. "Becca was telling the truth!" He flew up to us. "Gryphon, leave them alone!" Becca called. "Let 'em hang from the old rafter." She said. She and the others then laughed and left. Gryphon flew up to us. "Psst, Sonic." He whispered to me. "There's a hammer in the cake!" He said. He put the cake on top of a bulldozer that was right next to Shadow. "Coming, Becca!" He called. He then flew away.

"Well, the hammer's obviously contaminated the-" "CAKE!" Shadow interrupted Silver, then buried his face in the cake, messily devouring it. He then pulled his face up, showing the hammer stuck to the side of his face. "Shadow, it's on your face." "W-what's on my face?" He said in worry. "The hammer!" I said. "A TARANTULA!" He screamed. "Ah, get it off, Sonic! Get it off! Sonic, get it off! Off!" He yelled. Me and Silver looked at each other.

**(Alright, that's HedgeAggerate for you! Thanks for reading! Now, review or get urdered by the Tails Doll!"**


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